Image result for picture of a wife sweeping
Let’s begin with a woman’s responsibilities in her home which are properly understood only in the context of loving, servant leadership by her husband.

  • Being a helper
  • Being respectful to her husband
  • Loving her husband
  • Submitting to the leadership of her husband
  • Satisfying the husband sexually

 

Just like the process of making a dress, every bit of the duties are important to make every home whole and happy.

Back to the topic at hand, logically, when a lady takes the wifely duties when they ain’t yet legally bonded as husband and wife, she becomes the cause of her misfortunes. Firstly because she blocks other men from approaching her and also causes delay in her being married as the man already have what he was meant to get after marriage. If I may ask, “why buy the cow when the milk has been freely given to you?” Practically, the woman becomes a witch who works against her progress.

When this happens, the man often move on and picks another woman for marriage thereby becoming a bigger wizard.

One may ask why I refer to these sets of people as witches and wizards but in responds, I ask, What is witchcraft?

Witchcraft is practised in many distinct forms. Playing wifey to a man for years only for him to drop you for a lass who can barely wipe her nose is also a high form of wickedness.

Yes you are courting but why are you going over to his place with those “tutu mkpong” handbags to spend days or even weeks cleaning, washing his soiled undies, spending days mastering recipes and licking his lollipop?

To make it worse, you also nag, throw tantrums and sulk over the silliest thing like how he wears his footwear to the living room.

Have you considered why your friends who did same thing were told “Babe, i’m sorry it’s not working out” or “baby its not you, its me”? Some men in their mean nature even say “baby if you see anyone that is serious, please move on, i’m not ready yet” but surprisingly, the get married few weeks after the break-up.

Dear friends and sisters, to cushion yourself from the pain that comes with these practices, quit playing wive until a he puts a ring on your finger.

Yes every man wants a woman who will respect him, one who will be loving and domesticated and would want to know if the lady they are seeing is grounded or at least manageable in these areas but dear ladies, exercise moderation and play your cards right.

The way forward;

  • Cook once in a while because how else would he know your culinary skills?
  • Clean when you can because his knowing your level of domestication and neatness lies there. While cleaning, remember to remove the curb-webs, arrange his wardrobe and dust properly.
  • For sex, i’ll leave you to choose what is best for you.

But quit portraying yourself as a desperate wife wannabe.

It  isn’t bad for you to visit for weekends, but when you do, please pack out by Sunday evening or Monday morning.

Stop living things in his house, if he wants you over next time, trust me girl, he’ll buy you a toothbrush and surprise you with undies and if he wants you more frequently by his side, he’ll ask to meet your parents.

From my interactions with men across the globe, plus growing up as the only girl in a family of eleven, I have realized that men love it when you put up a chase, you don’t have to be at his beck and call, invite him over to your place, do movies or something but if you are too eager to rush over to his house to Cook and bend over the whole night thinking it’ll get you marriage, “sorry is your name”.

Your wifey skills should be unraveled depending on the level of his seriousness. Stop pushing too hard, and don’t insist to be known by his people, if he wants you, he’ll make the introduction as quickly as possible.

Let the man earn your efforts of cooking, cleaning and ironing. Why should you be committed when he doesn’t know your full name?

Most importantly, even as you unravel your wifey potential, some things are a no-no until he marries you. Top is getting pregnant. My friend, do you really admire baby mama’s?

Define what you guys have, be open minded enough to accept when a man is having a fling with you or he is serious then draw your limits.

Imagine your washing sheets, cleaning his apartment and cooking only for the main chick to roll on the sheets, mess the house, eat the meals and you return to do same. Wow!

Nevertheless, let this advise not serve as an escape route for you not to be domesticated at your fiance’s apartment. If you can’t cook, be open so he could know and assist if possible, don’t go under the pretext of not wanting to play wifey.

Study to show thyself approved once in a while. You cannot cook for a man but can you cook in the first place? Can you even wash your undies clean? Do you know how to tidy a house, remove cobwebs, clean the hidden areas, arrange stuff? Do you?

Don’t use “I won’t” excuse to hide the I can’t factor. If you have your own hustle, are emancipated, homely and domesticated then you are a wife material and won’t need to try hard to impress.